Tuesday, October 7, 2008

One step forward and two, maybe one, back!

Hey friends! Just got back from the NICU and here is a little update...Luke had NO brain bleeds on his ultrasound!!! PRAISE GOD!!! This was definitely an answered prayer! His doctor even told me today that he is "doing remarkably well for a little white boy!". Now for those that don't know, white boys do not fair as well as others when they are preemies. The strongest babies are black girls. In the NICU, they call white boy babies "wimpy white males"! I hope Luke proves them wrong!! On a more frusterating note, they might have to put his phototherapy lights on him again. His bilirubin count (the way your body breaks down red blood cells) is up again. He might need a transfusion in the next few weeks. The nurse assured me that we are not even thinking about that right now, but of course, it's in the back of my mind. Tom and Luke have the same blood type, so he could be his donor if he is CIV negative. The lab will have to test Tom's blood for this certain type of infection. Also, he has had 4 brady's today. :( Two of them happened when I was there and actually he had one when I was holding and rocking him. Jane, his nurse, said that he might have had one because he was in such a deep sleep while being rocked. Of course, they say this is common. They tried him on a new formula tonight that had more fat and calories, but he spit it up, so they put him back on his hypoallergenic formula. I have officially "thrown in the towel" regarding breastfeeding. It's just not happenin'! I fought a good fight, but mature milk just isn't there! Stress and having Luke too early and not actually being able to put him on my breast are all factors of why there is no mature milk coming down. The pump just ain't like a real baby so after 11 days of frustration, I decided to put it down. There is a slight possibility that when he comes home it might stimulate my milk and maybe I can try again, but who knows? As someone who REALLY wanted to do this, it's a big letdown and quite sad for me. But, I can be grateful for Luke doing so well! If formula helps make him big and strong, we will go for it completely!! Well, better go for now! I actually get a night with total sleep and no getting up every three hours to pump! I'm kinda looking forward to that! Love you all! Here is a sweet poem for you to enjoy:

Welcome to the world
I'ts going to be quite a show.
First, there is something important
I want you to always know:
You are my shining moon; you are my glistening sun.
You are my inner peace; you are my abundant fun.
You are my roaming land; you are my wavy sea,
You are, and always will be, everything to me.
~Crystal Dawn Perry


Brandy said...

He is such a cutie! Andrew used to sleep with his hands straight down by his sides too! Don't be too hard on yourself about the breastfeeding thing. You did the best you could and your body just would not cooperate. Syd & Ange were both formula babies and they are great! Have a wonderful day. Keep updating with photos :)

Jaime said...

I know you really wanted to BF, but no worries. ;) Logan has been formula from the start and no problems at all. Just think, now you can enjoy sleeping through the night for a little while. I can't imagine pumping being any fun.

Kristi said...

I am so proud of you Rhonda. Don't stress about the breast feeding thing. He is getting exactly what he needs right now. I love you and all of you are in our prayers!! Love you!! Kristi