It's good to be back!

Hey guys! I'm back from my "blogging sabbatical" and lots has happened since I left! Luke is growing like a weed! He is probably pushing 9lbs. by now! Can you believe it?? He has come a long way since his lowest weight of 3lbs. 7ozs.! I have stopped putting cereal in his formula...it was giving him too much of a bellyache and he was NOT happy about it. He went from a relatively good baby to one that I could hardly console. The cereal made him really constipated and he was just miserable - and so was I! We were having to give him diluted apple juice and it wreaked havoc on his little tummy - all kinds of noises and it just sounded really bad. We also had to give him glycerin suppositories :(. Not fun! So, after a week, I made the executive decision to take him off of it. And he seems to be doing OK. I do think he has reflux because he cries when he burps and he is still spitting up quite a bit, but it's not projectile so hopefully he will just grow out of it! He seems to be more like himself & he is not nearly as fussy!! He has been off the cereal for 3 days and until this morning had still not pooped. Pardon me while I discuss poo...it's just something mommy's have to be deal with! Anyway, we had Poopfest 2008 at around 7:30 this morning. It was bad ~ really bad! Bless his little heart! He acts like he feels MUCH better now, though! On a sad note, I currently have no car. That's right..my car is screwed up! I was leaving the Shell station on Friday night and did not see this HUGE hole on the side of the road and apparently I cut my wheel a little sharp and BAM - ran right into it! It has done something really bad to it...I could not get it to drive or go forward or anything! I put it in drive and it just revved like it was in neutral. Nice. We had to have it towed and will assess the damage tomorrow. Needless to say, I had a major hissy fit/breakdown/cuss fit/panic. If I am being tested, believe me, I failed miserably that night! I mean, I seriously had to ask God to forgive me for all the UGLY things I said! What else....Oh, I went to see "Four Christmases" tonight with Jen. It was great! Very funny! I love movies!! I want to go more often but never find the time. I had my shower last Sunday and it was wonderful! I got so many cute things for Luke and LOTS of clothes! My faves included three Feltman Brothers outfits and a Feltman Bros. bib! They are sooo nice and I can't wait until Luke is big enough to wear them! He also got lots of books and this cool rainforest thingy you hang on his crib. I also loved his monogrammed burp clothes and a homemade frame my friend Christy made. It was all so sweet and special! Speaking of my friend Christy, she had her sweet baby girl last Monday! Lanie weighed in at 7lbs. 7ozs. and looks JUST like her mommy (beautiful of course!). She already has Angelina Jolie lips and a head full of dark hair! Also, my mom is STILL in North Carolina! She has been gone over a month and it makes me sad that she has not seen Luke. She says she is coming home this weekend, but we'll see. Needless to say, she missed my shower. I'm not bitter...wait, yes I am! My MIL came over yesterday and let me sleep for a few needed hours while she watched Monkey. Then my sweet husband came home from the gun show, handed me a benedryl to knock me out (I'm a light sleeper), & told me I was going to sleep longer because he was going to watch the baby and I needed a break! OH I LOVE HIM!! I slept for, no lie, 9 hours!!! It was WONDERFUL!! And I have felt sooooooo much better since! Well, that has pretty much caught you up on what's been going on here in Smithville! Hope everyone is doing great!

 

 

 

Then...

Late September/Early October

What a tiny little monkey!!!

 

and now...

November 30

WHAT A DIFFERENCE!!

 
 

Luke crashed after Thanksgiving festivities! It's so hard being the cutest baby alive and having everyone wanting to hold you! Also, here is his Nonna (Tom's mom) holding her already-spoiled grandson!

 
 
 
 


Here are some recent pics of Monkey! His Daddy's hat is a little bit big, don't ya think? I love the one where he looks like a little drunk hobo! Fun with baby! Look how blue his eyes are! He is getting so big!

Feeling Convicted

So tonight, I am doing a little "blog-stalking" (my favorite thing to do, hands down!) when I happened upon a blog from a lady that talked about a "media vacation". She discussed how she has been so surrounded by tv, internet, email, texting, etc. that she was losing sight of what was truly important. I am guilty of spending no less than 1 - 2 hours a day blogging and reading blogs and yet I have not opened my bible in DAYS!! I've read the paper, watched the news, read blogs, read magazines...but no bible. What's up with that? I guess I just expect that God is always gonna be there for me no matter how I treat him. I can ignore him and sometimes even curse him, but boy, when I need him, he BETTER be there for me. Well, this is twisted. I am consuming too much time in earthly things and not enough in eternal things. I want to be perceived as such a great Christian, but only I know that I am so lukewarm that it is pathetic. I tell people that I will pray for them, and guess what? I don't. I tell myself that I am definitely gonna pray before every meal, and guess what? I don't. I say that I will read my bible everyday, but guess what? I don't. I feel a little hollow right now and I know that it is because I am not being filled with the spirit because I am pushing it away. I am not being faithful to God who has continually poured out His blessings to me. I am a liar. I talk a good game and yet I am not doing what I KNOW is expected of me from God. Time and time again I promise Him and myself that I will "be better this time". Luke is here and perfect and what do I do to proclaim my gratefullness? Nothing. I feel like such a fake. A big ol' faker. In an effort to reclaim what I am losing, I am going to take a break from this computer for a couple of days and get back into my bible. It is my sincere hope that God hasn't given up on me and my lack of discipline. I'm not going to be gone forever - just a couple of days. I promise to return with updates on Monkey - he should be home tomorrow. However, for the next few days, I have to reconnect with a relationship that I have let go by the wayside. Everyone have a great weekend and I will be back on next week!! Love you@

A trip to the ER

Hey guys. Please say a quick prayer today for Luke. He has had a pretty bad cough for the past few days and the docs did not seem too worried about it (they think it is just his lungs adjusting to normal air and not NICU air). Last night, I was feeding him and I think he tried to cough and drink at the same time and his lips turned blue! I sat him up immediately and patted him on his back and he let out 3 BIG coughs. Scary! The docs told me to go ahead and take him to Children's and apparently this is an automatic admission. They are observing him for 24-36 hours to make sure he does not have any O2 drops. I really think that he just did this b/c he choked, but they are taking NO chances since he is a preemie that has only been home a week. They say he should be home by Sat. afternoon. They are running ALL kinds of tests just to make sure we have NOTHING else going on (like an infection). I am pretty devastated that Monkey has to be back in the hospital but if everything works out and looks good he will be home tomorrow. I will keep everyone posted on what we find out.

Why does my son like to pee on me?

Seriously y'all! I have been peed on everyday since Monkey came home! Granted, it's usually around 2:30 in the morning and I am so tired I forget to "cover" it...boy, it wakes me up pretty good! Just getting used to being a mommy! It's really starting to sink in that Luke really is home and that we are totally responsible for his care! I'm trying to figure out his cries and his sleep pattern (which is around 3-4 hours at a time). I'm also still obsessing about my fear of SIDS so he has been sleeping on my chest (I know, I know...) while I sleep on our big over sized chair in the living room. I have ordered these mattress covers for his pack and play and his crib because of some research I have been doing on SIDS. Wanna get scared and paranoid? Google "toxic gas and mattresses". Supposedly "they" have found a link between a fungus that emits toxic gas from mattresses when is is mixed with the stuff found in flame retardant (which all mattresses have). So, this doc in New Zealand has created a cover that supposedly helps. There is a lot more to it (the sites discuss the latest findings of having a fan in the room and the whole "back to sleep" campaign"). Anyway, it could be totally bogus, but I think it is 80 bucks well spent! I really need to stop obsessing...why do I have this fear that he is going to be taken away??? Maybe I need a boost in my meds....I just love him sooooo sooooo much and I pray that God never feels as though I could ever handle something like my child passing away. I have to stop before I get too morbid!! On a lighter note, my friend Nicole from the awesome Footprints Ministry (see their link on my page) and I will be meeting with Brenda Ladunn for a segment on her "Matters of Faith" broadcast. We will meet and talk with her tomorrow at St. Vincent's and there is a chance we might even be on TV!!! Cool!! I'm such a dork! Seriously, this ministry is awesome and I am so blessed to have benefited from it and I really want to get involved. On a sad note, my momma is still in North Carolina visiting her family (she's been there a month)and probably won't get to make it to my shower on Sunday. That sucks. I mean, it really hurts my feelings...what girl doesn't want her momma to ooohhh and aaaahhh with her over all the fun gifts? But, you just gotta know my mom. She is a "different" breed of sorts. Really different. She doesn't see how this could upset me. She has had several chances to make it home and she has known about this shower for a while. She even told me today, "Well, I already bought him a gift."! How cruddy is that?? I just need to let it go and know that she loves Luke in her own way. And that I will never ever change her. She is who she is. And even though she has not called me since he has been home, I can't let it bring me down. Lots of people love Monkey and I know lots of people will come on Sunday. I just really want my momma there. But, she won't be. I'll deal. Have a good night everyone!

 
 
 
 

Tummy time on the monkey mat! Look at Super-Luke raise his head up!! Also, he LOVES his Baby Einstein mat! This is his favorite place to sleep! Not the fancy pack-n-play, not the fancy bouncy seat, not the fancy swing, no, none of those! His favorite place? On his Einstein mat. On the floor. Go figure! Oh, for those of you are wondering about the dogs...they don't bother him at all! They might go sniff at him but other than that, they leave him alone or just stare at him! They are such good dogs....

 
 
 
 

Warm and snuggly after bath time! Also pictures from our first visit to see Dr. Gleason!

 
 
 
 



Here is our first bath at home!! We can't submerge him yet in a tub because we have to wait until the circumcision heals. The docs didn't do that until the day before we went home. The t-shirt pic is where he peed on me!!

Welcome to my new life...

Well, the past few days have definitely been a learning experience! Being a mommy in way harder than I had ever imagined! The lack of sleep, the worry, the getting peed on, the realization that my life has been forever changed...Luke is a 24 hour a day job and I tell ya, it's hard, but worth it when I look into that sweet face. We went to his Dr.'s office yesterday and Luke got an "A+" from his pediatrician. He is hitting all his benchmarks and gaining weight. He also had to get his first round of shots:( It totally broke my heart! The look on his face when the lady stuck that first needle in his leg, OH MY GOSH! He also peed on the nurse when she was weighing him! Did I mention he likes to pee on people? (especially mommy!) Last night I had my first mommy breakdown. I was sooo tired (they told me he was on a good schedule in the NICU, yeah right...). He eats every 3 - 4 hours which is great, but it takes him 30 minutes or so to eat, then another 45 or so to really get into a deep sleep and usually he wakes up in between feeds b/c he is wet or dirty and then I have to get him back to sleep. So that leaves me with around 45 minutes to an hour of sleep/wash clothes/cook/clean bottles/visit with people. I just started crying to Tom! There is a part of me that says "whoa, you mean I gotta do this, like, for the next few years?? um....uhh...." and then there is the part of me that says "you ungrateful, selfish person! Luke is healthy and perfect and all of this should just be a complete joy and I should never anything but happy about everything because he could have so many problems!" But guys, its HARD and I am very overwhelmed! Yesterday was really rough because he was very cranky from his shots and he cried every time I put him down. Today has been better b/c Tom has been home and has helped me tremendously!! He is really so great with Luke. He feeds him, changes him, plays online poker with him...wait, I really don't think that is something he needs to do so young! Seriously though, I could not ask for better! I also got a chance to get out of the house for a little bit. Anyone that knows me knows that I am not a "stay at home" kinda gal. I don't like sitting around the house watching tv for hours at a time. I like to get out and go!! So, today I ventured out to the Pig and to Tractor Supply Warehouse. (By the way, they have their Autumn stuff 70% off and I got some really cute stuff for cheap!) Tom's aunt and uncle stopped by for a visit and of course to see Monkey. My friend Meg also stopped by for a surprise visit and she had gotten us a pizza, tea, and a pie for dinner! How great is that?? She also let me use some of her little ones' receiving blankets so we can swaddle our little man. Can you believe that I only have 4 receiving blankets left after our stay at the NICU? A couple of his blankets accidentally got mixed in with the things they keep on hand, so we really didn't mind if we got them back. Tom also hooked up our cool video monitor. Meg was actually the one who recommended it. It was a gift to us from some ladies I work with and it is great! The picture is VERY clear and it makes me feel better to be able to see him when I am in the other room. I still want one of those monitors that keep track of babies' breathing. They are at Target and I have read really good reviews of them. It's like a mat that they lay on when they are sleeping and somehow it tracks whether or not there is that up and down motion of breathing. Anyone ever heard of it or had one? Let me know what you think! Gonna go for now and do a little "blog stalking" of my own! I'm addicted. I know.

 
 


Here is Luke's snazzy new rainforest swing we got from Nonna! He loves it! He looks a little demonic in this pic...I promise he's not! He's really sweet! Also, here is Monkey's pack-n-play that he sleeps in. Well, "sleep" is relative! See, it's got monkies on it!! That's 'cause I'm clever like that!!It's not at the end of the bed...I moved it to my side of the bed last night before we headed to bed. I will get pics of the nursery posted when it gets complete. We still have to hang a border and pictures but it is really starting to look cute!

 
 
 


Here is my nephew Ryan holding his cousin...gosh, I remember when Ryan was this small....Also, here is my brother-in-law Chris holding Monkey!

 
 
 
 



Maddie again, and Jen holding Luke for the first time! Also, here is Aunt 'Shell holding him for the first time. She's gonna spoil him!

 
 
 
 



Here is Samson and Sojo checking out their new brother! They still don't know what to think about him!! Sojo gets really nervous when Luke cries and runs into where he is and starts whimpering. And here is my sweet Maddie holding Luke! She FINALLY got to see him and hold him!! She's in love with him (she calls him her brother) and is a big helper!

 
 
 
 


WE ARE SOOOOOO OUTA' HERE!!!!!! DO YOU LIKE THE CARSEAT?? IT IS THE CARSEAT FROM HELL!!!!! NOT VERY USER FRIENDLY....OR MAYBE IT'S TOO COMPLICATED FOR ME!!