Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Why does my son like to pee on me?
Seriously y'all! I have been peed on everyday since Monkey came home! Granted, it's usually around 2:30 in the morning and I am so tired I forget to "cover" it...boy, it wakes me up pretty good! Just getting used to being a mommy! It's really starting to sink in that Luke really is home and that we are totally responsible for his care! I'm trying to figure out his cries and his sleep pattern (which is around 3-4 hours at a time). I'm also still obsessing about my fear of SIDS so he has been sleeping on my chest (I know, I know...) while I sleep on our big over sized chair in the living room. I have ordered these mattress covers for his pack and play and his crib because of some research I have been doing on SIDS. Wanna get scared and paranoid? Google "toxic gas and mattresses". Supposedly "they" have found a link between a fungus that emits toxic gas from mattresses when is is mixed with the stuff found in flame retardant (which all mattresses have). So, this doc in New Zealand has created a cover that supposedly helps. There is a lot more to it (the sites discuss the latest findings of having a fan in the room and the whole "back to sleep" campaign"). Anyway, it could be totally bogus, but I think it is 80 bucks well spent! I really need to stop obsessing...why do I have this fear that he is going to be taken away??? Maybe I need a boost in my meds....I just love him sooooo sooooo much and I pray that God never feels as though I could ever handle something like my child passing away. I have to stop before I get too morbid!! On a lighter note, my friend Nicole from the awesome Footprints Ministry (see their link on my page) and I will be meeting with Brenda Ladunn for a segment on her "Matters of Faith" broadcast. We will meet and talk with her tomorrow at St. Vincent's and there is a chance we might even be on TV!!! Cool!! I'm such a dork! Seriously, this ministry is awesome and I am so blessed to have benefited from it and I really want to get involved. On a sad note, my momma is still in North Carolina visiting her family (she's been there a month)and probably won't get to make it to my shower on Sunday. That sucks. I mean, it really hurts my feelings...what girl doesn't want her momma to ooohhh and aaaahhh with her over all the fun gifts? But, you just gotta know my mom. She is a "different" breed of sorts. Really different. She doesn't see how this could upset me. She has had several chances to make it home and she has known about this shower for a while. She even told me today, "Well, I already bought him a gift."! How cruddy is that?? I just need to let it go and know that she loves Luke in her own way. And that I will never ever change her. She is who she is. And even though she has not called me since he has been home, I can't let it bring me down. Lots of people love Monkey and I know lots of people will come on Sunday. I just really want my momma there. But, she won't be. I'll deal. Have a good night everyone!